Bread of Life

I am sitting out on the deck of Luke's grandparents ranch this morning in awe of the beauty that is before me. 

In times of rest and relaxation, it is easy to be grateful and humbled by the grace in my life. I wish I could say the same for when times are hard and struggle is the only friend I have but I can't. I desire to be consistent in my thankfulness and in my awareness of the goodness of God. I want my intentions and my actions to reflect the constant knowledge that I have been given life. A life that should need nothing and want nothing because of the promise given to me. 

This morning I read a great entry in a devotional book that I want to share. It speaks directly to how I have been feeling lately and reminds me of where and from whom all good things flow.

"I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty." John 6:35

IN WORD: "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled," Jesus had said (Matthew 5:6). Now He tells us how. We will be filled with Him. He is the righteousness. He is the object of everything for which we truly hunger and thirst. He is the Manna the Father sent, the Bread that satisfies our souls.

Yet even today many believers seem hungry and thirsty. Jesus often seems absent from their lives.

Perhaps we hunger for the wrong kind of bread. Jesus says, "He who comes to me will never go hungry." Many of us appeal to Jesus for the goods of this world, the fulfillment of our own agendas, or the circumstances we would like to have. To us, Jesus is a means to another end - our goals. If this is our story, Jesus is never satisfying.

Perhaps we hunger for the right kind of bread but don't meet Jesus' conditions for receiving it. Jesus says, "He who comes, ...he who believes." Both of these conditions imply that we meet Him on His terms, not ours. We try to come with part of ourselves, but not all. We believe in some of His teaching, but not all. We want the benefits of the Son of God without abandoning ourselves to Him. If this is our story, Jesus is never satisfying to us, either.

IN DEED: But to those who hunger and thirst for righteousness and who come to Him without reservation, thirsting in Him as the source of all righteousness and strength, He satisfies. Those whose whole life is reoriented around Him and who desire nothing else will never want for anything. He is not our means to get bread; He is the bread.

When we follow Him by faith with nothing else to rely on, He provides. And we are filled.

"The heart of a man is restless until it finds its rest in Thee." - St. Augustine

Credited: At His Feet, April 2nd Devotional

Moment of Clarity

Clarity always appears when I least expect it. It appears in the most of mundane moments. Even though I know this, I still don't expect it to come when it does. But clarity came to me today. It came to me in the most simple of moments. Outside, with the evening breeze rolling in, throwing the ball around with Sammie. Mind you, I was in shorts since it was warmer out today, pink flurry house slippers, an Oregon State T-shirt and one of Luke's hoodies. Just showered, my hair not brushed, no make up on my face, only the smell of white tea and ginger lotion. Simply being. In the comfort of my own skin. Like I said, the most simple and mundane of moments.

Being outside, I just looked around myself and thought "man who would have thought I would be right where I am?" I never expected to be living in California, on lots of land. No matter what struggles I face day in and day out if its relationships, work, faith, money or life in general, God is there. And today, when the breeze hit my face and I witnessed my dog running around joyfully and freely in the orchards, God was so present. I won't lie, these last few months have been really hard. Moving away from everything and everyone we know. Starting a job that we were/are still so clueless about and blindly jumping into a life we never have led before. But in the moment of clarity I was reminded of this verse:

"The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still." Exodus 14:14

No matter what hardships I face or how alone I can feel at times or so misunderstood, I am reminded that if I am just still in the world, the Lord will fight for me. Not only will He fight for me in hard and complicated times but always. It is only when I am still can I feel and bear witness to His goodness. And today, I felt Him. I felt His faithfulness and love all around me while being outside. In every gust of wind and touch of the breeze, I knew He was there. He had heard me. He had felt my heart. He knew what I needed. And my gosh, it feels so amazing. It is reviving. It is healing.

And now, I am sitting inside the house we live in and watching the sunset and feeling so incredibly blessed. So grateful that the Lord gave me this day. He gave me this moment. And I will not take this for granted.

Lyrics I'm lovin'

Lost are saved; find their way; at the sound of your great name
All condemned; feel no shame, at the sound of your great name
Every fear; has no place; at the sound of your great name
The enemy; he has to leave; at the sound of your great name

Jesus, Worthy is the Lamb that was slain for us, Son of God and Man
You are high and lifted up; that all the world will praise your great name

All the weak; find their strength; at the sound of your great name
Hungry souls; receive grace; at the sound of your great name
The fatherless; they find their rest; at the sound of your great name
Sick are healed; and the dead are raised; at the sound of your great name

Jesus, Worthy is the Lamb that was slain for us, Son of God and Man
You are high and lifted up; that all the world will praise your great name

Redeemer, My Healer, Almighty
My savior, Defender, You are My King

Jesus, Worthy is the Lamb that was slain for us, Son of God and Man
You are high and lifted up; that all the world will praise your great name

Your Great Name - Natalie Grant

Schedule

I have been bit A-wall recently. Work has been super busy. After we worked in Portland, we turned around and flew to Denver for another event. Got home on a Sunday evening and the following Wednesday we drove to Las Vegas for JAMZ Youth Nationals. Didn't get home from Vegas until the following Tuesday morning around 7am after driving all night. I think the week of nationals we worked around 85 hours or so? Not sure, but we are still recovering and trying to fight off a cold before we work this weekend and head back to another nationals in Vegas next weekend. We are also working an event in Phoenix the weekend of nationals.

Modesto to Vegas.

Vegas to Phoenix.

Phoenix to Vegas.

Vegas to Modesto.

Oh my. It is going to be exhausting!! I am just super excited to see some family friends in Phoenix while we are there! Well, its off to work for me! I promise I'll post more soon. :)

Simple

Something I have been thinking about a lot recently is simplicity. There is a beauty in the simple and uncomplicated. I believe I correlate simple with pure. Untarnished. Innocent. Free. Calm.

Life itself doesn't ever seem simple. It usually feels the complete opposite. I wonder how much of this is nature, the fact that humans are made of millions of cells, hundreds of bones, and parts of our body that can't even be found. The consciousness. A soul. What our body and mind can produce, emotions. Love. Hurt. Pain. Happiness.

Yet, it feels backwards to me. I believe the reason we were created and live and breath is simple. To love and be loved. To give without expectations. To forgive and not carry fault. To trust without reason. To have childlike faith. If I truly followed those five beliefs, I would live a simpler life.

Not one of those beliefs mentions anything materialistic or of this world. They all deal with a persons character and heart. Then, why if I believe these things do I still continue to have a complicated life? Why do I struggle with things that should not matter? I must find a way to continually remind myself of where I come from and Who created me. He is all that matters and in seeking Him, I should be simple. I hope to find simplicity.

"For God is not a God of confusion but of peace." 1 Corinthians 14:33

No servant can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money." Luke 16:13